go vegetarian.

bye guys... |11:40 AM

everything will be so much better if i am not around...decided to leave everything behind and go...

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

stewpid fish... |8:28 PM

=)...went fishing with yang and mr yest and well..had quite a lot fun only AFTER we manage to catch some stewpid fish...its a rare breed..these fishes will act swim to shoreand get out of the water like they all committing suicide..hmm..stewpid arent they?..

but guess wad..from this lil stewpid fish incident makes me rem someone..knowing dat the shore is near and still go on dashing towards it..humph..well..at least i knoe i have said wadeva i needa say to him and dat theres nuthing more i can do..oh wells..to that someone : "wadeva happens..i will be by you yea?..i just cant get myself to be angry with u for long..hmm..if ure the stewpid fish ..i will just wait for u at the shore quietly..till u arrive..and when ure struggling for oxygen..i will pick u up and throw u back into the sea regardless of how much of a fish-phobia person i am"...take care yea?

hahaz..i must thank mr and yang man for the great ton..thanks for being there for me and take care yea?..i will see ya guys around soon...hahaz..never realise how much i miss u guys till i need u guys..=)

chaos~

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

changes... |11:37 PM

just realise lotsa changes took place after the As..when i pass by bukit panjiang plaza a few hrs ago..met boss there and later we head to mayspring to give our senior ying ying some face for her 21st birthday..

well..back to the changes..i was passing bpp just now and found dat they have starbucks there and stuffs..shops i have never seen before when i was still schooling in pj..which got me thinking abt how much changes took place after As..

some of my bestie team mates are working now...and like i am no longer a student in the mean time and stuffs..when the enlistment date of my friends approaching..i start to wonder whether i can take it being alone still working my time away...

basically..i am a person who seriously cant stand loneliness...stuffs liek eating alone travelling alone are things i dun feel comfortable with..dats y i cherish my friends alot..

spoke to bb yest and learn dat i was sensitive..hmm..to think abt it..yes i dare not deny..but "why?".. i ask myself..well..and came out with this ans so as to have sth to show myself..

probably because i need people who cares abt and looks after me..hmm..sth like a guardian angel i suppose..i mean..i dare say for all my life as a servant leader..i have been looking after my team mates and juniors like my own younger brothers or sisters..i try to give all i can for them..showing them care and concern in my own sorta way...but..
who was there to look after me like how i look after people?..hmm..someone i cant find the ans..well..guess god have not allow me to meet my guardian angel yet..
that is prob why even when it comes to relationships..i seek for someone who can look after than someone i need to look after..i mean..yea..well..guess tentatively the ans will be as so till i find a better argument to rebutt this..

for now..i gotta sleep..drank a lil just now..and somehow aint feeling rite..got a lil of gastric..gotta take some med and get some rest and get myself ready for work tmr..chaos~

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

class gathering... |11:25 PM

had a rather great day today..was at this "kushing bo" jap restaurant thingy...(i dunno if i got the spelling rite)..but well..the food aint bad..it was more on the better side..okay la..as amanda and may said..the impt thing is not the food..its the people..but well..all went well..did some catching up with them and those guys esp fed me with more details abt ns and wad i am abt to face in like 4 mths time?...oh yes..and we watched this dumb movie.."the promise" which turn out to be more of a comedy than wadeva movie it was suppose to be..was laughing my hell out of it man..hahaz..happy?..well..everything was cheery till i reach home and recalled wad had happened the past week..well..now as i am blogging..i am back to the loner me again...but well..my mum (amanda) told me before.."wadeva happens..life have to go on yea?"...

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

trust... |11:23 PM

i have already lose trust in a friend i consider close to me...God..get me out of this man..

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

f**king work... |9:14 PM

bloody hell..work scene today sucks la..countless peopel wanted their msg in chinese..then make things to luan in the office.. to top it all of..my stewpid manager...kaos..keep taking our stuffs to mess up the stuffs we sort out..sometimes i dunno wad is he doing in the office..smoke..walk around..nag..man..and he gets paid like 10 over times more than anyone else in the office..the way he does things like sick la..no quality control..only care abt how the customer gonna pay him..so..so..inflexible..
came home and there comes my dad..i simply cant wait to get out of the house la..its been years since i tolerated with his immature and nonsense..how i wish i can have enough $ to get a house and move out man..livin with him just adds on more stress to my life..
seriously..i wonder how much longer can i hold on to my life..everything aint going well...from family to friends to **** and everything else..arghh..i just need someone to talk to..
i just envy my colleague..elaine who has this good friend dat waits for her after work everyday near the office..i just pray to god dat one day i will too have a friend like this..
right now..i suddenly miss the presence of this yakking non-stop friend of mine..i need someone to talk to man..and he seems to be the best at this point in time..how i wish hes back..but guess wad...hes in china lookin at rocks and mountains i tink?...
life alone sure cant get any worse...

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

the phone rang... |11:44 PM

just got woken up by a phone call..true enough..it was him..he called to so called apologise substituting word sorry with the word paiseh..true enough i was shaken..
people whom i often speak "heart to heart" with would have prob knoe this by now...theres only 2 person who can actually...crudely put it.. "control" me..one of which is obviously my best friend and the other is prob him..why him?..dun ask me..i seriously dunno..guess i just have a soft spot for him yea?..
well..at first..i dunno why people react so greatly to blog postings..but then i came to realise..its the word "concern" dat brought them to ring me to say sth to "appease" the bad temper monster hidden inside me...
i just wanna say a word of thanks to the 2 concern person..but this whole things is not u guys fault la..its just my view of things and prob i am having my pmsing again..thanks and sorry yea i cause such a big hooha
working tmr again..wad to look forward to this tmr..seriously i also dunno..wadeva comes la..

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

wheres my someone... |8:27 PM

When the world, leaves you feeling blue
You can count on me, I will be there for you
When it seems, all you hopes and dreamsAre a million miles away, I will re-assure you
We've got to all stick together
Good friends, there for each other
Never ever forget that I've got you
and you've got me, so

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-

bad day... |12:02 AM

dated 13/12/05

this is practically one of the worse days of my life man..never knew working life would be so sucky..so much posting filing typing to do..and to add on to it..things around me aint going smoothly....

to begin...a chapter of my life hanging around her has been put to a stop just a few days ago..she decided to give up on waiting for me...well..a word of advise to her..wise choice..2 yrs is a long time..waiting aint the best option after all..sorry man i sorta upset u..but i only promise to talk abt it after my ns..and not like asked u to wait 2 yrs..guess wad..we are still good friends yea?..i hope..learning pt from this incident.."people dun care how much u knoe but how much u care" yea?...simple gestures like waiting for him for dinner..or even giving him some encouragement help sometimes...changing someone aint the best way out of a relationship..u should accept him/her as who he/she is..=)

then today...make things worse from all the guilt..from the moment i stepped into the office..i was told to go out on delivery with uncle donald..to post some xmas catalogues..before xmas...man i tell u..taking so much lifts and walking here and there aint easy..i still prefer typing D/O in the office man and enduring all the noise and nagging and complains...haiz...halfway thru..i thought i picked up my phone and check out how she is doing..and so i did..i short 5 mins conversation was enough to assure me dat she was fine...well..i later on decided to have dinner with them..so i told her to help me cancel my pract...then the worse part of the day came..

i was happily back in the office looking forward to dinner..when things change for the worse..i got an sms from one of my good friends saying dat she might be meeting someone else for dinner..so i thought well..having dinner without her is fine when he told me he will be going to play mahjong if she is not having dinner...this totally turn me off la..i was like...dunno how to put it..slog one whole day looking forward to the dinner when sth liddat just turn me off..although they did decided to have dinner in the end ..but..aiya..i lost my mood..i was too upset for it..so i rejected the dinner...was rather sad...i teared..i mean..i dunno la..prob from all the stress at work..then sth like this just broke me down...

sorry man i sorta snapped at u in the sms just now..with regard to work and u not replying..i mean i was sad and angered la..thats why the harsh smses and replies...haiz..

for the mean time..i just wanna be alone...i dun wanna hurt either of them by words i said which i dun even actually mean it...pms?...petty?..i dunno..maybe i am..for i just knoe i was disappointed..and it takes alot to cheer me up again...

=(

moo.
=chow=.

-got milk?-